The Phoenix & Me

c7ab5c8c2750e1782ba13e22158f9d63I don’t remember when, but somewhere along the road I learned about the mythical phoenix, and ever since then I’ve identified very strongly with it.  Just like my husband and I have a totem animal, I believe the phoenix is my own personal totem animal.

My writings are always filled with the imagery of taking flight, rising, soaring, being reborn from ashes.  It’s never something I do consciously, but it’s something that always comes out in my writings.  My two poems that I have posted here recently, The Epic and Rising both illustrate this, and most of my other writings incorporate these elements as well.  It’s only something I realized a few years ago when I was reading through all my poems.

For as long as I can remember I’ve always said that I am a phoenix.  Not to say that I’m a mythical bird that bursts into flames, but that the phoenix represents me so well.

“The mythical phoenix is the keeper of the fire in all of creation. It represents transformation, death, and rebirth in its fire.  As a powerful spiritual totem, the phoenix is the ultimate symbol of strength and renewal.  As both a fire and solar symbol, the phoenix animal guide is symbolic of the sun, which “dies” in setting each night only to be reborn in rising the next morning.  In this sense, it never truly dies; rather, it is an immortal creature continually rising from the ashes.”

https://www.sunsigns.org/phoenix-animal-totem-symbolic-meanings/

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Just like the phoenix I too continue to rise from my ashes.  I may have crashed and burned more times than I can count through my life, but I never gave up.  I never gave in.  I continued to be “reborn” stronger each time, just like the phoenix.  It speaks so deeply to me.

And like the phoenix, symbolically, I have lived many lifetimes.  I may only be 32, but I have experienced so much in my life.  Each chapter has taught me new lessons, made me stronger, and helped me to learn more about who I am and what I want out of life.  I am constantly evolving.  I continue to be “reborn” every time I crash and burn, but I’m stronger for all that I have been through.

Now, here’s the funny and ironic thing.  A few years ago I was reading about my astrological sign which is Scorpio and came across something which made me stop and go, “Wow!”  There are three totems of a Scorpio: The Scorpion (of course), The Eagle and the Phoenix / Dove!!!  It was funny because for such a long time I always felt so connected to the symbolism of the phoenix and sure enough it is a totem animal of the Scorpio! [source]

 Phoenix and dove – The symbol of peace:  

This is the totem where the true power of a Scorpio is shown to the world. This is the totem where a Scorpio becomes aware of his/her mystical powers of healing. While most people consider a Scorpio to be a venomous creature, the true power of a Scorpio lies in healing and spreading peace. That is the ultimate way of exerting ones power. That is the reason this totem is symbolized by a dove. But this is not easy. A Scorpio needs to go through a complete transformation to achieve this power. This transformation is symbolized by the phoenix which burns and rises from its own ashes. A Scorpio is the only sign in the entire zodiac known to have this power. Hence every transformation in a Scorpio’s life can be symbolized by a phoenix.”

https://exemplore.com/astrology/Totems-of-A-Scorpio

I think symbolism is extremely meaningful and powerful.  I think you can learn a lot by what speaks to you.  There’s signs and symbols everywhere.  For the longest time I had a beautiful phoenix bracelet that I wore everyday, but it broke recently.  I definitely need to get a new one.  The phoenix is me and I am the phoenix.

And just like the phoenix, I will constantly arise stronger from my ashes.

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